Zombies and pirates, and even zombie pirates.

I hate zombies because everyone else loves them. Well I also hate them because they're ugly and stupid, but my hatred of zombies mainly boils down to their popularity. All of a sudden out of nowhere there was this intense zombie craze that I just couldn't buy into. If I really wanted to watch a dilapidated grey being with its skin hanging off of its face I'd go visit my grandma. Just another stupid fad brought to you by some asshole from Hollywood. 

It was the exact same thing with pirates. Out of nowhere pirates become the most popular thing since music and I'm sitting there thinking, 'if I didn't buy into it when I was a kid, there's no way I'm buying into it now.' Trust Hollywood to help a gang of fancy boys who wear puffy shirts and tights to become popular with the masses. And then there was that movie, Pirates of the Caribbean. It didn’t just have pirates in it, but also zombie pirates. So as expected people lost their minds and emptied their wallets.

Being a pirate consists of long boat rides full of men, destroying other boats so you can steal all their precious belongings, killing the crew, and I haven’t even mentioned all the taking it up the ass that went on at night after the rum came out. Being a zombie consists of being so stupid you cannot talk or function other than slow movements and low groans, kind of like when someone is staring at their cell phone. So this is what's popular amongst the people of today? A bunch of flag flying, freaky homos, and some flesh eating, drooling retards? It's no wonder the youth of today is turning out the way it is. If they can't take what they want they will eat your brain. Better have your shotgun ready.