NOFX

Hello, tonight I will be attending a soiree at The Fabulous Commodore Ballroom where a loutish fellow called Plump Mike will strum a bass, sing nasally, and act like a drunken ass. There will also be a stinky dread head named Melvin, no relation to the Melvins, and an even more hefty chap called El Heferoni. They will play music of the punkish variety and people will crash into each other. Yes, it sounds quite awful and scary, but I must go for research reasons, and research reasons alone.